Science Fair Queen

Hello working mothers!!!! It has been such a long time, please forgive me, but I have truly been mothering while working like never before! So much so, that I have not posted in weeks, however my thoughts have been with the blog and this week I felt called to the blog to express thoughts about this all important balancing act of "mothering while working". This week was filled with "Aha" moments for me. The type of "Aha" that requires rethinking how much can one continue to mother while working. At some point we have to make a decision to do for ourself so that we can truly and effective be the mothers God calls us to be. It is such a duality that sometimes I can't believe I am doing it, despite all that life has thrown at me lately (remember life is happening while we are working, mothering, living, its all how we respond). My goal is always my family first, I never sacrifice beyong reason when it comes to my family. It helps to have a wonderful support system in my husband and children. Each day is a new experience and a trial that I welcome. It forces me to stay in my prefrontal lobes when my limbic system wants to take over and my brain stem wants me to throw a temper tantrum-LOL.

I hope all of you working moms are doing well and are doing even better at mothering while working. Just to give some context to my week: I trained every single day this week in different towns throughout NC including a presentation for a national conference. In addition, I balanced promoting my business (http://www.enterngome.com/) and helping my 3 superstars with their science projects. Talk about exerting some serious brain cells. Can you say "Wore Out"! I am learning to accept that there is no rest until you take your last breath. God willing, my time will be enough to witness the fruits of my seeds.

The payoff came today when the children set-up for the science fair at their school. Although I was restless, listless, irritable, on the brink of collapsing while trying to help get all the last minute details of each project in place before they set-up, I became instantly inspired when I saw a room full of children and their parents engaged with their projects. The little battery life I had left suddenly recieved a jump that lasted til the end of the science fair. For some reason almost half the children including one of mine decided to do volcanoe's. Somewhere there must be a volcano on the brink of erupting because these children exhibited every variation and modality of a volcano that you can imagine. Glow in the dark volcanoes, trash bag/soda bottle volcanos, plaster volcanos, you name it, they had it.

At a time when schools are struggling with parent participation, I bear witness that each and every time you put children on display, the parents will come out and support their children. The science fair judge even gave my husband and I a gold seal sticker for participating. Trust me when I tell you I was not ashamed to ask for one, it was so pretty and shiny, and I felt I deserved one-LOL! I worked so hard this week as I do each day, but the reward is always the children. Today it was not just my children, but all children. Oftentimes, I receive praise for the way I parent and to some it may look easy. Somehow, I manage to put my family first, it doesn't happen perfectly and I have my husband and children to remind me when I am not putting them first.

As mothers who work we have to retrain our brains to making children and family our priority, not our jobs and career. That is the ego at work when we allow decisions which may cause us to neglect our families to arise. There is a theory which holds that you can pick up the pieces from your job but picking up the pieces from failed relationships is much harder and not always worth the risk when it comes to your family. So start saying no to menial job duties, plan to have lunch with your children, pledge to make time to help them with their science fair project (no matter how many children you have), allow them to lead activities and discussions, go to the park, work-out together, play together, plan together, it's the little things. Get off your gadgets and pay attention to your children. It will break your heart to hear "Mommy played with her phone more than she played with me."

It's not easy, but we can do it. With great purpose, intentionality, and consciousness, the possibilities are endless. Put children and family first. This is what must me done in order to inherit the kingdom our children are entitled to : )

Science Fair Superstars

Mothering with great Intentionality,

Donellia

Savvy Working Moms Save Money

Who wants to save money, raise your hand! This post is inspired by several things, one being the need for my household to save more, as we spend hundreds of dollars a month on food for a household of 5 (where's an EBT card when you need one-LOL), the other inspiration came by way of watching the coupon savvy divas on tv, and the final inspiration came from bearing witness to a couponer save over $180.00! Her final bill was $20.44 at Target! Okay, I'm sold! Bring on the scissors and the Sunday papers please!

Couponing for me is one of those things I want to do, mean to do, but don't prepare and make time to do. It seems like an all day task that I do not have time for, but i do have time to save more money, so I am willing to make the time sacrifice. If I can save $180.00 in a single bound, I will do what it takes to clip some coupons. I asked the woman who I witnessed save all this money how she does it, she gladly told me she hosts an online coupon class every Tuesday from 7-8pm. At this point, I know God is speaking to me, if I bear witness and get an invitation to something, the door is wide open and the money saving angels are upon me-LOL!

Now, I am starting as a novice and I must say that I have used a few coupons here and there but not to the point where I have an arsenal of coupons when shopping. The best I do at this moment, is using the store flyer of the store I am shopping in to use for savings. Apparently that is not enough and yields very little in the way of saving big time. As a working mom, I will be working into my schedule a few minutes a day to search and collect coupons. This will require me to get plenty of Sunday newspapers. Now I am at the point where I dont want to purchase anything without a savings. I out it out there and I am not a cheap person but I like to save when I can (we have 3 that are going to college). This is a good thing because I now have the desire to get the best deal at the best price which will increase cost savings. Another idea is to have a coupon date with moms to clip coupons, trade and maximize couponing.

I am at the point where I dont want to purchase food without a savings. This week for instance, I went to a particular grocer (Kroger) who had Capri Suns, fruit, and an organic cereal on sale for .99. I must have purchased about 7 boxes of cereal and 10 boxes of Capri Suns and several pounds of organic pears, organges, grapes, kiwi, nectarines, mangoes, plums, limes, bananas and apples. The sale was too good on some decent quality food. If it were not for the sale, I would not have been in the store at all this week.

Working mothers have to be savvy savers and savvy chefs to keep our households healthy and happy. Eating healthy can be expensive, however we can be savvy and bigger savers using coupons from healthfood stores. WholeFoods, EarthFare, and TraderJoes all have savings and coupons. The Farmer's Market and food co-ops offer great savings on good quality foods.

Raise your coupons up, get your carts ready, and get to shopping for the best food at the best price! I'll keep you posted as I master this coupining thing! Feel free to post any great deals out there and Ill be sure to do the same! Here's to smart saving and savvy shopping!!

Click below to access the online coupon class:
Online Couponing Class

Raising Tech Savvy Children

As parents, how do we compete with the Wii, laptop, iPod, iPhone, iPad, XBox, PS3, DS3D, Kinect, Leapad, cable TV and every other tech gadget on the planet? Simple: we don't compete! What where we (80's babies) doing before all the electornics: talking, having dinner, playing outside, exploring, being children. When I grew up in the 80's, we had an Atari, VHS player, stereo, typewriter, and a computer in the home (Im dating myself b/c all of those items minus the computer are OLD-LOL). I remember being outside far more than I used or played with any of the electornics we had. We also had a set of encyclopedias, magazines, books, and artwork in my home. I was fortunate to grow up in an area where nature was abound and abundant. Naturally, I was an inquisitve and creative seeker of knowledge. I had a balance of both worlds. Nowadays children are getting more of the devices and less of the experiences. Children want, need, and appreciate boundaries and rules including limits with their gadgets. Okay the last part is an overstatement, they dont like limits on their gadgets, which makes for good priveledge tools.

My children have (courtesy of their gracious grandparents) all the latest tech gadgets. We set limits, no gadgets during the week so that they will focus on their school work (we cave in every now and then, but stick to this for the most part). On the weekends we try to plan activities outside of the house to get them moving. We sometimes play the Wii togther which is good for family fun. On their Ipods, we play games like Scrabble (yes we are semi-nerds) and Monopoly. Lately my 6 year old has been wearing me out with Scrabble.

Technology is not a bad thing. It is a very good thing, this advancement of knowledge and the capacity to absorb, communicate, translate, transfer and trancscend knowledge. Technology has endless capabilities. We have the proverbial story of a 2 or 3 year old who knows how to operate a remote or cell phone better than an adult. There are 4 things we as parents should be concerned with. One is getting children to have a balance so they understand and value human interaction. You can not text your job interview, you cannot text a speech to your corporation (maybe if you were Steve Jobs or are Bill Gates), and you still need to know how to answer a landline correctly. Two, children need to be safe while using technology, so many people exploit children through technology. Parents must monitor and advocate for safe use of technology. Thirdly, how technology is shaping a child's mind, inspiring creativity, and promoting learning. Finally children still need to have their heads held high, nowadays everyone's head is down, buried in their phone. I fear we'll be walking on all fours soons because our heads are so low. Next time you're in a public venue, notice all the people with their head buried in their phone, laptop, or tablet, you will be shocked. Make sure your children keep their heads up! Read more below:

Here is some insight from www.gigharbor.patch.com:


Are we teaching our children to lead a balanced life?

This generation of children is able to grasp technology and its advantages. But some of the simple, common-sense things we know are slipping through the cracks of knowledge that kids are getting from home and school.

For instance, most children do know about text messages on cell phones. On the flip side, some college-age students do not know how to address a letter, where to buy stamps and the importance of a thank-you note sent swiftly (within two weeks).

How about seven-year-olds who learned to Velcro their shoes and still do not know how to tie a bow on the sneakers? This is convenient for fast-off and on shoes because parenting these days is a speedway of trips in the car with places to go and things to see.

But kids need to learn fine motor skills. These small, muscle skills are important to developing handwriting, picking up and placing things and hand-eye coordination. Coloring, drawing, and, yes, even video game playing can help this small motor skill develop.

The family often is running from place to place, and grab-and-go dinners happen far too often. Do our middle school children know how to work a can opener? Can reading a recipe teach them some survival skills? Yes, we have been told that family dinners are important for building relationships, but they can teach knowledge of a life time skills too. How to make a salad, when to start the vegetables so they are ready with the chicken casserole can be passed onto most middle schoolers.

This generation has gained technology information and speed, and there is a label being placed on this challenge. It is called "growing up Google". Can we help them become problem-solvers without sending them to the search button on the computer? It's okay to research for knowledge, but there is another type of knowledge search, only this one is gained from a lifetime of experience.

By being involved in the family, community and school, children young and old can be well-balanced in learning.

There is a benefit to common knowledge given to children through example, parental teaching and life learning. Things like taking a walk, studying nature, seeing how the sun comes up and goes down at night can all be told through pictures. But doing it yourselves and seeing it in real-life provides another life time learning. Skills that are developed while experiencing things hands-on can be balanced with technology like cell phones, computers, DVRs, and the Internet.

Let's make sure that our children can ride a bike, throw a skipping stone, tie their shoes, know how to read a recipe and follow it. Teach common skills. The benefit for our children will last for a lifetime.